Last weekend on the inside.

Its official this was our last weekend in home quarantine. May 1st it will be over. We will be free to start taking Kate out, and showing her off in public. Its been 11 months total, almost her entire first year. Its been so long that honestly I don't really know what to expect when it is over. Part of me just doesn't think it will be that different. This is what happens when your abnormal lifestyle slowly becomes your normal.

There have been a few perks to all this time at home. First and foremost, we avoided RSV, H1N1, influenza, ear infections and a few other illnesses. It was great on the pocket book. Amazing how much money you save when you never leave the house. Though you really can buy just about anything on-line. I also started doing a few things I never thought I would, such as blogging. But, I most say the house is not clean and those type of projects never happened.

We really got to know our daughter too. I mean I know it not possible or even needed for everyone but her little world has been exactly what she needed to grow and be healthy. She had a routine, naps in her crib and a very attentive audience. We didn't have the stress of trying to pack her all around. We didn't force her to nap in her car seat while we ran lots of errands. For somebody who had a pretty rough beginning she really has had the last 8 months to grow and be cozy with mom and dad.

Now on the flip side, there are lots of things we need to catch up on. I feel like we have the largest newborn ever. I have never even taken her into a grocery store, or mall. I've hardly ever had anyone else touch her for that matter. She hasn't been to see Ed's work. She hasn't met hardly any relatives, much less traveled for a visit. Our diaper bag looks like we just got it.

Beyond the logistics of doing things with a baby, we can't help but have a bit of anxiety over this big step. I refuse to live our life in fear though. I want Kate to be independent, brave, and resilient. I have to embrace these qualities then too. I don't want her beginning to shape every aspect of how we treat and view her. Its time to start making new memories.